Choice

Merriam-Webster online dictionary (http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/) defines "discernment" as "the quality of being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure". In the spiritual sense, "discernment" can be loosely defined as the gift of the Holy Spirit which gives one the "ability" of making known to one's self at a certain degree of certainty the will of God regarding a certain matter. It is a gift that is used whenever one is to make a decision. One of its basic principles is that "discernment" involves a choice between two good things, never between one which is good and one which is bad. This summer I face another decision which needs discernment.

I am in the summer of my third year in law school. I have not applied for any summer internship program or a summer job that requires reporting at regular hours because of an important event which will most probably be jeopardized by such. However, boredom and years of being used to having a set of required task to do each day, together with the fact that my financial resources are dwindling and that nagging sense of unproductiveness prompted me to accept an invitation of a classmate to a legal researcher job that does not require regular work hours. I was accepted to the job. I found the details of the job exciting, and as my future student internship program director told us, and has a high pedagogical value as far as I am concerned. The work may prove to be challenging but the pay is just enough to pay the rent for the month. Such was expected but I hoped that the job would be more financially rewarding.

Here is the catch. There is a possibility that a job would be available that has a considerably higher remuneration (higher, meaning that two weeks worth would amount to fifty percent more than what the other job offers) and that I am very familiar with. The possibility is really very high. One might say that the subject is moot, as I have accepted the job and my sense of honor (yes I have one) would not permit me to renege.

The discernment was required before making such decision, and for this choice time was not on my side. Looking back, I knew what made me choose the job of a legal researcher. I need the money but I believe that I need the experience and knowledge that my chosen job will give. I am embarking on a new profession that I have to train for. This choice made me realize that I have to let go of the familiar and embrace the unfamiliar so that I may be better prepared for the new path that is ahead of me. The choice I made will lead me to unfamiliar territory but I know that when I emerge on the other side of this territory, I will come out a stronger and better person. The choice I made may have been a lost opportunity cost monetary wise but I think that it will be profitable in the long run. I think, that's what counts.