Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Because of the Cover

It has always been a great failing of mine
Buying something then "regretting"
Always thinking
That I should have bought the other thing.

Because if I did bought that other thing
I will end up wishing to have bought
What I originally ended up with

Such was the case
Of a recently made purchase
It was love at first site
(As in website)
I immediately got attracted to its form
Not minding much
The features attached

And so I went
Armed with almost enough cash
(Truth be told, I had to borrow the lack)
To many a cellphone stores
And lo and behold, I saw
What I have coveted

Indeed there was a choice
Between one that has more features
Yet I would save more
Even the good saleslady
Recommended the other
But I was not thinking
For I was enamoured
And so the purchase was made

I was happy

Now the happiness is not as much
For I have discovered
That still I feel a lack
Now I seem to think
That I have not purchased much
(Though it indeed cost me)
A better one, though not as good looking
Could have been bought
And I would have in my hands
A thing of more substance
Than that of this one
Which could only boast
Of a really good facade.

But it is the facade that I bought
And it is the facade that I am left with

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Natabunang Puntod

Dumarami ang tao, hindi ang espasyo
Nadadagdagan ang namamatay, hindi ang paglalagyan
Kung may kakayahan ka, sa pribado ka
Sa pampubliko kung wala ka.

Sa memorial park, puntod mo
Daig pa ang bahay
Ng daily wage worker na buhay
Kung sariling lupa nga wala ka
Pangpuntod mo pa kaya makabibili ka

Kaya't sa amin
Ang mga bagong libing
Binabaoon na lamang
Kahit saan basta may lugar
1 meter by 2 meters
Basta't kasya kahit sa daanan.

Sa tabi ng puntod ng lolo't lola ko
May inilibing sa daanan
Hindi raw masyadong markado
Kaya't hayun natabunan
Todo's los Santos dumating
mga anak, tatay hinahanap
Nakusap ang aking nanay
sabi'y tatay nilay nariyan
Marahil nga'y naroroon
subalit isang ruler na simiento
ngayo'y mas nagbaon

Sabihin ko man na sila ang may kasalanan
Ngunit naisip ko lamang
Wala namang pipili
Na pumanaw na ama
ibabaon sa daan.

Flowers, Candles and a Baby Bottle

Walking to the direction of my grandparents grave, I noticed a very small grave.
It was at the left edge of the main pathway, obviously out-of-place there.
It measured a little over 2 x 4 feet, with a very prominent wooden cross placed horizontally over the grave.
It was obviously the grave of a baby or a very small child.
He or she is obviously the child of a poor family.

What immediately caught my attention was the three-fourth's full baby milk bottle placed atop the grave.
In between two flowers and two candle stubs is this very small baby bottle.
The bottle was there 9:30 in the morning and it was still there 7:30 in the evening.
The bottle made me think. I found myself asking these questions:

Who prepared the bottle? Was it the father, the mother, brother, sister, tito, tita, lolo or lola?
What time was the bottle prepared?
Was it real milk inside the bottle?
If it is real milk, is it real infant formula?
If it is real infant formula, was it prepared with the correct combination of milk and water?
Did the person who prepared the milk bottle bought milk or just asked from his or her neighbor?
Was he or she who prepared the bottle crying during the time he or she is preparing the same?

The bottle struck me. For me, there is much love in that baby bottle.
Candles and flowers one most likely buys and have arranged.
But that bottle, one has to prepare. There is much love in that baby bottle.
And maybe, poor as the family is, they may be much rich in love.

November 1

My favorite holiday?

You guessed it, November 1, All Saint's Day.
I am more excited over it than Christmas or New Year's Eve.
Why? Maybe because I find a certain distinct "magic" about the event.
For one, it is spent in a cemetery or memorial park.
For at least once a year, a place of dread, ghost stories and horror stories
is transformed into a place of fellowship, reunion and "fun."
(Yes, the time should be foremost a memorial for our dearly departed (but then again that should be on November 2) we should take time to pray for their souls, but the reality remains)

I remember the time when as a young kid, me, my cousins and some friends will make a contest
as to who will create the biggest and smoothest candle ball (made from candle drippings).
We used to scour the entire public cemetery looking for that candle dripping with just about the
right consistency, temperature and malleability to include in our growing creation.
Many the times when we were shooed from doing so with threats of bodily harm but ignored them anyway.
It was such a carefree and blissful experience.

Well, I should also admit that maybe, just maybe ;) that a part of my liking for this event is the fact that the area occupied by the final resting place of my grandparents are surrounded by the final resting places of people who have such pretty granddaughters. It was the only time of the year then that I see them and maybe, just maybe ;) I had this boyish crush on them. (To this day, only I and a common cousin remain unmarried.)

Today, All Saint's Day still remain as my top holiday, yet I felt that the magic does not remain. The reasons are no longer there. This year, I tried making another candle ball. Well, my younger cousins beat me to it. As I have said, all our "pretty neighbors" are now married and have children and the boyish crush no longer remains. The cemetery is now doubly crowded (this will be tackled on other posts) and one would find it difficult to navigate. Ganon talaga e.